Wednesday, January 11, 2006

The Jennifer-Brad-Angelina Dilemma

Alright, so I like Jennifer Aniston. She's adorable. She's finally decided on her own style, and it's fabulous. She and I could be friends. Really good friends. We'd go to lunch, get manis and pedis and facials at a spa, and gab about guys. Then we'd go shopping, and buy long ruffly hippie skirts, flat strappy sandles, and gold jewelry.

I also like Angelina Jolie. She's hot. She's got great lips and hair. She helps children and women around the world. She's a little bit crazy, and I like that about her. She and I would go out and party all night, we'd crash and wake up for a late brunch over at some trendy spot, then happen to see some amazing high sexy going out shoes in a store window on the way back, go in and spend a fortune on accessories we don't need.

And Brad Pitt is gorgeous. I like him scruffy and clean shaven, with long hair and short. He's amazing as Tyler Durden, awesome as that guy in Ocean's 11, pretty cool in 7 Years in Tibet, and hot as that stud in Thelma and Lousie.

And this new baby of Brad's and Angelina's is going to be beautiful.

And a little bit screwed up.

And I still feel badly about the whole Jennifer-Brad breakup thing. I would have worn a Team Aniston shirt (but I would have secretly bought a Team Jolie shirt and worn it to paint in).

But I love the new baby, and I would babysit it for free. Because Angelina and I are best friends.

14 comments:

pinkibeanlover said...

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Liz said...

I'm a team aniston girl all the way...

And I get the feeling that this brangelina baby is going to have the strangest combination of features that it's actually going to be quite hideous... but you know, plastic surgeons have surgeries to fix that!

v said...

Jennifer Aniston is fake and was sucking the life force out of Brad! He would have died if Angie didn't come along! You all know it!

Team Brangie!

Is it frightening that a heterosexual man is obsessed with a celebrity couple? Yes it is.

Seacrest out.

The RetailJunkie said...

I hadn't realised until I read it on some other sites, but Brangelina waited until the 1 year anniversary of the official breakup of Brad and Jen to announce the baby - Ouch!

Jsto said...

Remember when you tried to do your hair like Angelina in Gone in 60 Seconds. You crack me up!

Kat said...

Team Jolie, bitches!

I'm with tg8. Aniston is phony. She's everything that's terrible about Hollywood wrapped up into one aerobicized package. I do not agree with Angie's practice of "stealing" men from other women AT ALL, but I still don't sympathize with Jen. She's a wax statue. Angelina may be a little wacky at times, but at least she's a real human being, and a humanitarian! (But I'm surprised she reneged on her statements about not wanting to have kids of her own when there are so many kids out there to adopt.)

blog Portland said...

I say the three of them get together and live happily ever after. Seriously, they are all way too perfect for each other.

Kelly said...

I agree with the above comment.
They are all making me just a tad sick at this point.
I am for sure a fan of Jen... and I have to say that I have not even seen one of Jolie's movies. (eek. I know.)

Kat in da Hat said...

I still say this is Brad's mid-life crisis and that he'll eventually end up in my bed.

All of Angie's goodwill is BS to cover up the fact that she's a man snatching ho!

HelpMeBubba said...

I "ditto" kat in da hat's comment. Except we might have to get in a chick fight to see who ends up w/ Brad in bed first!

I'm an Aniston fan. Ang is a home wrecker. However, she is one hot home wrecker.

jane said...

I like Angelina, her works is tremendous. I think there's more behind the Aniston/Pitt thing than we know. I don't dislike Aniston, but she does nothing for me. Angelina has to be the hottest woman on this planet and that's without anything plastic, fake, raised, plumped or otherwise.
As for the baby....no doubt it will be a cutie, but then most are. (I have seen a few ugly ones)
I absolutely love your blog & wanted to rent my blog to you but someone else bid first.
I'm definately adding you to my blog list.

markus said...

they all have millions of dollars... i think they're all spoiled.

Elizabeth said...

I am definitely a Team Aniston girl. Another woman's man is a another woman's man. however, that being said, I would definitely switch sides if Angelina ever hit on me. I am more attracted to her than I am to any other woman, celebrity or otherwise.

SarahReznor said...

definitely Team Aniston - i identify with victims...