Sometimes I feel like I'm falling in a rut:
Tonight while I was throwing a pot of water onto the stove to get dinner started at 9pm, I worried that all my meals these days start with me roasting red peppers and onions and involve pesto in some way. And not homemade pesto. Store bought. I know, I know. But let me tell you, I compile the those peppers, onions, basil, and garlic in unique and flavorful ways.
If only I could get this dinner started before 9. But. There was working out and going to the store that had to happen first. And I'm a good cook, but I can't make pasta without... actual pasta. Or in fact, any real starch at all in the apartment. And in my apartment, carbs are king. Well, ok, for me carbs are king, and I'm cooking, so I'm in charge.
We could talk about my rut with cleaning the apartment: I don't do it. Wow, that was an easy talk. Let's move on.
I get into a rut with clothes. I wear the same outfit over and over again, not pushing myself to actually look at my wardrobe and put together something fun that I've never put together before. And. Some people might not care, but I really like doing that. I like looking different than I've ever looked before. And I don't want people to see me and think, "Wow. Is Marcia wearing those flowered jeans and tunic length top again? I think we're all tired of that."
Even with the blog, if I don't have anything to post, I can easily take pictures of my shoes (and get more comments than normal!). Or maybe talk about my sternum some more. Because, seriously, people, The Pink Shoe is the footwear and sternum capital of the internet.
If only there were more google searches for sternums. Then I'd be internet famous.
And then I remembered that I'm not doing this for you. I'm doing this for me. Because I feel that it's important to put myself out there. To write. To take artsy pictures and explore that side of myself.
The amazing and unexpected side of all this narcissistic self exploration is that I have made some amazing internet friends. I have found myself plugged into an intelligent, funny, thoughtful, caring group of people, none of whom seem to be psychotic murderers (Wait! There are people on the internet who aren't psychotic murderers? Who knew?).
And I remembered that, got my ass out of that rut. And wrote this post.